According to Matsuda and Cox, EAL writers often struggle with cohesion and coherence because they also struggle with signposting, with using “the transitional words and sentences that move readers between ideas, and the structures the mark the organization of a text.” (p.45). This issue is only briefly mentioned in Matsuda and Cox’s “Reading an ESL Writer’s Text” text but one I find myself needing to address again and again in appointments with multilingual writers.
Below, you’ll find tips I came across while shadowing a class at DePaul’s English Language Academy, a program designed to help students focus explicitly on their language skills. These English Language Teaching-specific tips, originally from “Sourcework: Academic Writing From Sources” have given me a new way to both address issues of cohesion in multilingual writing and to talk about grammar in a way that emphasizes its rhetorical power—and deemphasizes error-free writing for the sake of error-free writing.
1. Use guiding language.
2. Create lexical chains.
3. Use pronouns clearly.
4. Keep verb tense consistent.
5. Link old and new information.
(Source: Sourcework: Academic Writing from Sources)
I’ve included sample comments and comment rationales below to demonstrate how a tutor might implement these types of cohesive strategies (while not necessarily using Sourcework’s verbiage). I’ve also drawn from my own experience to comment on which of these cohesive strategies has appeared to be specific to American Academic writing and therefore needs contextualizing. As you’ll see, I’ve cut up the text in order to present each strategy. A full version of the writer’s text is available at the bottom. Finally, below is the prompt for the sample writing on which I made these comments:
Prompt: Write an argumentative essay that answers the following question: Should American students learn a foreign language in college? Use the three articles provided for your arguments. Cite when needed.
Cohesive Strategy 1: Use Guiding Language
This strategy, which involves explicitly signifying one’s organizational choices to a reader, is probably the one that tutors are the most familiar with. Utilizing topic sentences and ending paragraphs with sentences that set up a reader to move to the next paragraph are both strategies that many U.S. high schools and even middle schools teach. Besides guiding sentences, you can also help a writer incorporate more guiding phrases such as phrases that are helpful when elaborating, summarizing, or refuting.
Many people argues that it should be a right for students whether they learn foreign languages or not, like Berdan thinks in the article. If it is an option, students and the US may lose a lot of merits. They will miss the best time to learn a second language and the opportunity to improve their brain ability. The US will not be able to become a better country. Therefore, I maintain that learning a foreign language should be compulsory.
Sample Cohesion Comment: As a reader, I had to slow down here to notice the shift in opinion between the first and second sentences of this paragraph. To make it easier for your reader to notice this shift, you might use a phrase that better highlights the shift and the connection between sentences. Suggestions: “However,” “On the other hand,” or “Nevertheless.” This resource has more phrases common to American academic writing that you can use to guide your reader for shifts and other transitions: https://writing.wisc.edu/handbook/style/transitions/
Rationale for Comment: Many other written traditions expect more of the reader when engaging with a text than we do in the U.S. To try and signal what the U.S. standard entails, I included the note about how the phrases are “common to American academic writing.” With this paper, it might also be a good idea to highlight how the writer used “therefore” correctly: As a reader, this phrase helped me understand that you were making a final claim that was based on evidence previously given.
Cohesive Strategy 2: Create Lexical Chains
This strategy sounds more complicated than it is: Repeat keywords and words related to those keywords. This is pretty simple but can be really helpful for keeping a reader’s attention as an argument around a topic develops.
This reason alone is a sufficient answer for why learning foreign language should be required.
Sample Cohesion Comment: As a reader, I found this argument particularly strong. However, since there was no mention of “college” in this entire paragraph, I momentarily forgot the main purpose of the text: to explain that the specific setting of college should be used to learn languages. In American academic writing, it’s good if a text is constructed in a way that helps a reader have the main purpose in mind at all times. You might consider repeating more of your keywords (college or its synonyms: university, higher education, post-secondary setting) either in this sentence, at the beginning of this paragraph, or somewhere within the paragraph.
Rationale for Comment: Here again I’ve emphasized the American context because I’ve found that when I’ve given such advice to multilingual writers, they’re surprised. They’ve often made references to how this is overkill and too much babying for a reader. Here, I’ve also offered up synonyms for the keywords because vocabulary is one of multilingual writers’ biggest struggles.
Cohesive Strategy 3: Use Pronouns Correctly
I have often commented on pronouns under the label “Pronouns.” My ELA observation reminder that pronouns are used for cohesion has made me reconsider how I can avoid “Pronoun” labels and instead use the label “Cohesion” to address the more macro issues of cohesion within or between paragraphs (while also commenting on issues related to pronouns). When it comes to cohesion with pronouns, I find myself often making comments to students about using less “it” and “they” (particularly when they are unclear) and using more demonstrative pronouns like “these” and “this.” I’ve also found it helpful to model how to use a “This/These + catchall noun” construction to help a writer quickly move between ideas. Helping readers use phrases like “these issues” or “this downside” has helped me help writers not only with cohesion, but also with paraphrase and summary skills.
When I came to the US, one of the thing that shock me was almost every american speak only English. I had been envious American people because they speak English very well until I knew the fact.
Sample Cohesion Comment: As a reader, I had to pause here and think for a second what you are referring to by “the fact.” To make the connection between this and the previous sentence more clear, you might use the word “This” instead of “the.” A demonstrative pronoun like “This” is often used by American academic writers to refer to ideas that have already been presented. For more on using demonstrative pronouns in academic writing to link sentences together, see the following resource: http://online-resources.elc.cityu.edu.hk/ELSS/Resource/Referencing%20with%20Demonstratives%20ICOSA%20Version/
Rationale for Comment: Demonstrative pronouns are considered cohesive devices–words that help readers see the connection between sentences and paragraphs. Given that cohesion is a higher-order concern than article errors, it’s likely more helpful for the tutor to use direct feedback here and focus on introducing the word “this,” rather than focus on all the many possible errors that arise with articles like “the.”
Cohesive Strategy 4: Keep Verb Tense Consistent
Shifts in tense leave often leave a text disjointed. To help a reader have more cohesion in between sentences, comment on tense shifts and suggest adding time markers when tenses do shift.
One of the thing that shock me was almost every american speak only English. I had been envious American people because they speak English very well until I knew the fact.
Sample Cohesion Comment: Here, your shifts in tense from present “shock” to past perfect “had been” leave me a bit confused as to when you had these feelings. To make it more clear for a writer and to add cohesion between these two sentences, you should put them in the same tense (past or present). Another way that you can make sure that a reader knows exactly when you had these feelings would be by adding a time marker: “When I…” or “In…”
Rationale for Comment: With this comment and problem area, I didn’t think it necessarily helpful to reference the American context. I think it’s enough to simply emphasize one’s experience as a reader when tense shifts occur.
Cohesive Strategy 5: Link Old and New Information.
When I came to the US, one of the thing that shock me was almost every american speak only English. I had been envious American people because they speak English very well until I knew the fact. University student can strengthen their competitive power if they learn a foreign language as Doyle argues in article.
Sample Cohesion Comment: When I was reading your text, I struggled to understand the connection between these two sentences. To add the level of connection and cohesion that American academic writing often requires, I’d recommend linking the “old information” in the first sentence with the “new information” in the second sentence by including a mention of the “old information” in the second sentence. One way to do this would be by: “This makes me think that American university students should strengthen their competitive power as Doyle argues in the article.” Alternatively, you could use phrases like “Taking this into consideration,” “Given this fact,” or “This leads me to believe….” As I mentioned earlier, demonstrative pronouns like “this” and “these” can be really helpful to quickly refer to a previously mentioned idea or word.
Rationale for Comment: Since the advice to “link old and new information” can take such a variety of forms, it would also likely be helpful for the tutor to identify ways in which the writer is already doing this. With this text, a tutor might comment on how it’s easy for a reader to move between the third and fourth sentences because “the article” is mentioned at the end of the third sentence and then used to start the fourth sentence. Alternatively, a tutor might highlight the efficient use of the phrase “That’s why” in the third paragraph or one of the uses of “this” to reference an already presented idea.
Full Student text:
One of the thing that shock me was almost every american speak only English. I had been envious American people because they speak English very well until I knew the fact. University student can strengthen their competitive power if they learn a foreign language as Doyle argues in article. The article only mentions the reason but I think there are more reasons why learning a foreign language should be mandatory.
First, it is best time to learn a second language. Of course, if people learn a second language in their childhood, it is better as Bardan mentioned in the article. Unfortunately many americans do not learn it and even if they learned in their childhood, it is impossible to memorize that for about 15 years. I think the most important thing to learn foreign language is to speak it with other people. In college there are thousands of international students. As long as language learners want, they can talk to native speakers. So I think it is best time to learn a foreign language for college students.
It is better for students’ brain development. According to a research that I recently read, people who has a second language has more complicated brain which simply means that they are smarter than others who have only mother tongue. For example, bilingual, even though they learn second language when they are adults, are able to multitask better than others. This is because in everyday life when they use one language, one language interferes the other one and this process stimulates brain. That’s why people who have second language can work difficult tasks more effectively. So, learning a foreign language is worthwhile for future job seekers.
The last reason is the most important reason why learning a foreign language should be mandatory. the United States is a country of immigrants. This means that many people in the US are from other countries like me. Foreigners are everywhere in the US. So after graduation, students may have to work with them. Language is not only a method to communicate but it also imply history, culture and a way of thinking. So, learning foreign language can broaden people’s view toward other countries. Furthermore, I believe that more people learn a foreign language, more people resist racism since one reason of racism is ignorance. America can be more than just an advanced country. This reason alone is a sufficient answer for learning foreign language should be a required subject.
Many people argues that it should be a right for students whether they learn foreign languages or not, like Berdan thinks in the article. If it is an option, students and the US may lose a lot of merits. They will miss the best time to learn a second language and the opportunity to improve their brain ability. The US will not be able to become a better country. Therefore, I maintain that learning a foreign language should be compulsory.
References
Dollahite, N. E., & Haun, J. (2012). Sourcework : academic writing from sources (2nd ed.). Heinle/Cengage Learning.
Matsuda, P.K., & Cox, M. (2011). Reading an ESL writer’s text. Studies in Self-Access Learning Journal, 2(1), 4 – 14.