In the past few weeks, I have had a surprising (and slightly overwhelming) amount of conversation partner appointments. Some have been wholesome and wonderful, some have been a little awkward, and some have been downright strange. However, through these appointments, I have started to develop some techniques for when the appointment starts to go downhill in one way or another:
The “Sneaky” Agenda
It’s so easy to sit down with a conversation partner and immediately start chatting about life, school, the weather, and so on. However, I have found that my conversation partners get a lot more out of our appointments when we set a structure and an agenda. Usually I ask if they have a presentation they’d like to practice, or if there’s any particular conversational situations in which they feel the most uncomfortable.
Unfortunately, when I ask writers these questions, they often shrug their shoulders and say they just want to talk. These appointments tend to get a little awkward after a while, since there’s only so much small talk you can make before the uncomfortable silences ensue.
When a writer is too stubborn to make an agenda, I often try to use the small talk to our advantage by steering the conversation towards struggles they’ve had with speaking English. This way, we can start to focus on the situations they have a hard time with, and by doing this we’ve set our agenda!
Let the Writer Take the Wheel
Sometimes I’ll be talking with a conversation partner and I’ll suddenly realize, “oh no, I’m talking way too much!” It’s easy to accidentally fall into a trap of natural conversation, but as tutors we always have to keep in mind that there is a point to these conversations: helping the writer become more comfortable speaking English. Therefore, it’s generally best to let the writer guide the conversation along.
This isn’t to say that the appointment should turn into some sort of interview between the tutor in the writer; it’s still important to respond and converse often! However, if pronunciation, fluency, or confidence are issues for the writer, letting them do a lot of the talking is definitely a top priority.
Plug DePaul Counseling Services
This tip is reserved for more uncommon situations. Usually I allow for anything and everything to be on the table during a conversation appointment, but sometimes topics can get a little too touchy for the Writing Center.
Recently I had a conversation partner appointment with a guy who was super nice, but who had chosen to make an appointment with me specifically because he saw that I’m a psychology major. Long story short, he seemed to think that I was a therapist, and he was asking for diagnoses due to some issues he’d been having lately. I was a little shocked and wasn’t sure what to do!
My very first thought was to tell him about the counseling services that are offered here at DePaul. They offer 20 free individual appointments for students, along with an unlimited number of group therapy sessions. I suggested that if he wanted a professional opinion on the problems he’s been dealing with, seeing a licensed counselor would probably be his best bet!
Of course we’re here to help anyone at the Writing Center, but there’s some things that are outside of our expertise and responsibility. Redirecting writers to services that can really help them can be far more beneficial than just trying to find the right words to say in an awkward or difficult situation.
Hopefully these tips can come in handy if you ever run into any issues in a conversation partner appointment! Overall, I love having conversation partners come in, and usually these appointments go pretty smoothly. However, there can be times when conversations start to take a challenging turn, and this is when these tips can come into play. I hope they can help you as much as they’ve helped me! Happy conversing!